{"product_id":"walmert-david-jr-lagattuta-9798296442475","title":"Walmert: The Musical: A Novel","description":"\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eWALMERT: THE MUSICAL\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003ci\u003eThe only novel guaranteed to make you snort-laugh in public.\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eOne disgraced Broadway diva.\u003cbr\u003eOne thousand hours of retail community service.\u003cbr\u003eZero chance of surviving with dignity.\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eWelcome to Walmert #0711, where the fluorescent lights never sleep and the customers look like they escaped from a fever dream. Harmony Clang thought she'd seen it all-until a court ordered her to clock in at the weirdest big-box store in America. Forget jazz hands-she'll need hazard pay and a rabies shot.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eInside, it's chaos: tap-dancing returns lines, customers returning haunted NutriBullets, and an emotional support worm named Beyoncé. The staff? One garden gnome with a criminal past, a manager who treats trauma like a competitive sport, and coworkers who treat every shift like a Tony Awards afterparty gone wrong.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eBut the real kicker?\u003c\/b\u003e\u003cbr\u003eSometimes the whole damn store breaks into a musical number-complete with fog, backup dancers, and lyrics about discount toilet brushes. You'll laugh, you'll cry, you'll never look at retail the same way again.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003eIf you've ever wondered what would happen if \"Superstore,\" \"Glee,\" and \"The Office\" collided in a blue vest, stop wondering and start reading. This book is chaos, comedy, and karaoke for your soul.\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003cb\u003eClick BUY NOW and clock in for the wildest ride in retail fiction. Curtain's up-don't miss your cue.\u003c\/b\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cp\u003e\u003ci\u003eYou've never read anything like this.\u003cbr\u003eDon't wait for a price check-grab it now!\u003c\/i\u003e\u003c\/p\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eAuthor:\u003c\/b\u003e David Jr. Lagattuta\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eISBN-13:\u003c\/b\u003e 9798296442475\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePublisher:\u003c\/b\u003e Independently Published\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eLanguage:\u003c\/b\u003e English\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePublished:\u003c\/b\u003e 08\/03\/2025\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003ePages:\u003c\/b\u003e 150\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eFormat:\u003c\/b\u003e Paperback\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eWeight:\u003c\/b\u003e 0.46lbs\u003cbr\u003e\u003cb\u003eSize:\u003c\/b\u003e 9.00h x 6.00w x 0.35d","brand":"David Jr. Lagattuta","offers":[{"title":"Paperback","offer_id":49170693325055,"sku":"9798296442475","price":12.0,"currency_code":"USD","in_stock":true}],"url":"https:\/\/www.whiterainbookhouse.com\/products\/walmert-david-jr-lagattuta-9798296442475","provider":"WR Book House","version":"1.0","type":"link"}