Lost Before I Could See: Navigating My Way Through Mental Illness (Paperback) (ISBN-13: 9781965340899)

Victoria Molta is a person who has lived with a diagnosed serious mental illness for over forty years. But more than that, she is a writer who has chronicled her life journey in her book, "Lost Before I Could See: Navigating My Way Through Mental Illness." In her book, she has chosen to write about her adventures and challenges, and though there have been setbacks, losses, and failures along the way, she never gives up. She continues to grow and learn, no matter how terrifying it can be to start new episodes of life with very little knowledge or experience, as well as a disability. She never ceases to go forward, with strength and courage, and wants the reader to know that whether living with a disability or not, life is hard. But the main point she wants to make clear is that she never gives up and never loses hope.

Victoria takes the reader on a kaleidoscopic tour beginning with her childhood in southern California, living in the San Gabriel Valley with her family. She describes her father's mental illness and alcoholism, and how, eventually, she succumbs to mental illness as well, as a young adult. She describes her family as one born of privilege and wealth, though definitely not exempt from tragedy and dysfunction. Through all her breakdowns and setbacks, she continues to rise and find meaning from chaos. From that, she develops empathy for people who have been marginalized by society and finds deep connections. In her 30s, she marries Bill, a man she had met in a halfway house where they both were living during the 1980s. It turns out to be a wonderful life partnership where they support each other in their work experiences as well as find joy in adventurous travel experiences.

Later in life, they buy a house and settle down near the shore of Long Island Sound with their rescue dog, Mandy. They appreciate the simple things in life. Peace that once seemed boring is now so appreciated because drama, which had dominated her life for so many years, no longer matters to her.