My Life As A For Sale Sign (Paperback) (ISBN-13: 9781913289836)

Now I suppose you might think this is going to be boring. Rest assured you WOOD be very wrong! So, allow me TO LET you into some of the many things I have come across.
I'm always on show and just crave for attention, you know you want to read all about my life, from humble beginnings in a faraway forest where I was cut down in my prime. Then becoming a FOR SALE sign, which is the next chapter in my time here on planet Earth.
I've sold them all; big and small, even grand posh country houses. You would not believe some of the gossip and amusing stories I've had to endure, not to mention the situations I've been in, along with having the amazing ability to make up irritating, silly little rhymes whilst standing around waiting. Basically, I'm just an all-round superstar.